The first night home with him was really really hard. Mainly because I just didn't know what I was doing and I worried about everything. He had a little jaundice and it was stressed to me that the way to get rid of it was to have him eat eat eat and then poop it out.
Combine that pressure with the pressure of breastfeeding and it made for a nightmare. BFing is so NOT easy. My emotions were off the charts, but that is to be expected after birthing a baby. Thankfully, I had my mom at home helping me and I have tons of supportive friends and family who called or left encouraging messages. It may not seem like those things would make such a difference, but they really really raised my spirits and let me know people were thinking of us and praying for us. I cannot tell you enough how much those voicemails, Facebook messages, texts, and phone calls meant to me.
We got rid of the jaundice and Britton attacked the breasts. :) I say attack because he basically turned my nipples into hamburger meat. We visited the lactation consultants at the hospital 3 times in the first week and a half. At my last visit, the lactation consultant told me that my nipples were some of the worst she had seen and to stop nursing and just pump and feed him from a bottle until I healed. She had my OB call in a compounded prescription nipple cream and it has worked wonders. The first pumping I did after meeting with her actually expressed blood from my nipple. The milk was pink. It was bad.
Britton's lower jaw apparently has not fully developed and it causes his lower gum to bump the top of my nipple and it basically gnaws. Now that I am pumping and feeding him expressed breastmilk, mixed with formula, things are much smoother and I feel more confident. I go back to the lactation consultant on Thursday and I'm sure she'll say I can resume him back on the breast.
My fears are:
1) I won't make enough milk. (I can pump about 1 to 1 1/2 ounces and he is eating about 3 ounces a feeding.) We make up the difference with formula.
2) Britton will have forgotten how to "latch on" and won't have the patience to wait for my milk to drop since he's been getting instant gratification from the bottle. He hasn't had to "work" for the milk.
I also dread the long nursing sessions. Before, he would nurse for almost an hour on both breasts. The way we do it now, I can pump in about 5 minutes and he takes the bottle in about 10-15. Add in burping and a diaper change, and it's still way shorter.
Granted, using formula involves warming the bottle, but we are doing that anyway now.
Oh, well. We shall figure it out. I am taking it one day at a time. It keeps me sane. ;) Getting out of the house for mundane errands keeps me sane as well.
Overall, he is a WONDERFUL baby. Lewis and I are really blessed with him. He is soooo good. Yes, we are losing sleep, but it could be worse. Britton really only cries when he is hungry, he is wet/dirty, or he's cold. He is so laid back. We love our boy!
He lost his circumcision ring last Wednesday. And he lost his cord on Thursday. His first bath was also on Wednesday. He smells sooooo good when he's freshly bathed!
Here are some recent pictures of him. The first is from Monday 4-13. The second is from today, 4-14.